It’s Not My Fault
Too bad Robin Williams did the thing that I can’t seem to quite get myself to do despite the constant swirling of said thoughts inside that head of mine. But he did it and I haven’t and now who’s going to be the one, fictional…
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Tacos Por Favor
I was going to write about baseball but then yesterday happened. Sebastian and I went Skateboarding yesterday. It was my first time on the board in about ten months, you know, surgeries, fractures, and stuff. Body no longer cooperating kind of stuff. Anyway, I spent some…
Silence
I’m headed out to Joshua Tree today. I’ll be attending a ten day silent meditation retreat there. I look forward to the experience. This morning, however, as I said good bye to Sebastian I began breaking down like a little child. Unlike my little child, who was…
A Grilled Purple Carrot
“So, what did you have to eat?” “Well” Sebastian says, “Pizza!”. “Of course.” I say. It was, after all, a day trip to Dave and Buster’s with his winter camp. “What else? I ask. “Chicken Nuggets.” “And?” “French Fries.” “And?” “Cookies!” His eyes are lighting…
Sick Boy
I tend to forget that Sebastian is only six years old with all this stuff that’s going on at this age: he’s learning to read pretty damn well, he is athletic beyond anything I could have imagined (Scholarship!), including skateboarding at daredevil levels (Sponsorship!). He has…
The Fight Goes On
I suffer from unrealistic expectations of myself. Delusions, really. I guess it stems from the early period of my life when I was given the impression that I’m not good enough, smart enough, and that I’m a real crock of shit. I carry the feeling of…
Bad Papa West Origins, A Trilogy – Episode 2
Part 1: Isolation, Anhedonia, and Heath Ledger For Episode one click here. Disclaimer: This is a blog post. As such I am rushing through events and condensing timelines, leaving out details and explanations that I would include in a memoir or a screenplay. I don’t…
A Space Mountain of Lies
Parenthood is about letting go. Letting go of power and of control. Control, in the early stages of childhood, can manifest as deceit at times. OK, lies. I’ve turned to Bush Jr. White House tactics. I was lying to my son for his own good:…
Sorry, Kid.
Yes, yes, I know. We’ve been having a blast watching the Mets get to the World Series. Cheering on home runs, outs, calling balls and strikes, yelling “Thor” whenever the camera caught his blonde mane. It’s been a good run. It still is. The Mets…
Where’s the Magic?
Yesterday Sebastian turned six. What a ride so far. When he was born we were subjected to a torrent of baby gifts and greeting cards. One of the cards stood out to me at the time. “Have a magical childhood, Sebastian!” it read As I…